Heartbroken

I am so heartbroken at the moment. Some may think I am a bad mother or that I don't care. I do care. And as I am sitting here I find it so hard to concentrate!

My nunu was admitted yesterday. His nose is heavily congested. He breathes through his mouth 90% of the time. He can hardly drink his bottle. He was diagnosed with Bronchiolitis and his ananoids are a bit swollen.

I have hardly slept the last few days. Took him to a GP on Tuesday evening. Wednesday evening I could see that he is not doing so well. Yesterday morning I decided that I am taking him to another GP. When I walked in the Dr's room, all he said was : "this child Needs to be admitted". So off to the paed we went. There the paed said the same thing. I had to keep the tears back. I could see that my nunu was suffering alot. Last night was just as bad. I hardly slept. He was restless and his nose was hecticly congested.

I could not stay with him as I just started this job and don't want to jeopordise this job. Some might say that my child is more important than my job. And I would say, you are right! But how will I feed my child and pay for his meds and pay for his wellbeing if I am out of a job? I know how hard it is to find a new job! I have been there way too many times. I love my son very much.