Our road so far

We have been married for 18 months and together for almost 4 years. We both want 2 kids. We decided that we will wait for a year after we are married to TTC. I then decided that I want us to start as soon as possible. My husband agreed. I went off the BC in July 2007. th edoctors says that it would take 6-12months for the BC to work out of my system. We were happy to wait. It has been 1 year and about 4months and nothing! Urggggggggggggg.........

Now I am starting to get worried. I have even gone into depression, even considered and tried suicide because I felt inadequate. I could'nt understand why it was not happening for me and still don't understand. Every day I am told a different story by people. My Dh also started with that story. "It will happen when you stop thinking about it". Urggggggggggggggggg......

How can he tell me that? I see so many young girls that ARE NOT ready for it and it happens for them. WTF????? I have realised that life is one unfair son of a b!tch...Urgggggggggggggg.....

But then I found these GREAT ladies!! They have been a blessing in disguise. They have given me the hope and strenght that I thought I had lost. Always reminding me that there is a way and that there is no burden that God will give you if He knows that you cannot carry it.

I have also realised that there are so many reasons why. Maybe I am not ready as yet? Maybe I will first get that job that I long for with the right hours? Who knows what the future holds? Who knows? Maybe there is a Greater plan unknown to man.

But I pray each day that He blesses us and all those that are waiting for that Bundle of Joy. I pray that He blessed us and our partners. I pray that God will be our guide, strenght and also that He give us patience. All in Your time Lord. We may not always undesrtand and we are human and we question You. I ask that You protect us on this journey and that we never loose track of our goal and that You take those stumble block out of the way.